What did you call me?
by aj23701
Summary: Haruka should really learn not to mess with the senshi of time and space. Or at least to watch her mouth.


A/N: I got this idea from my running epic, "I Think I'm in Love." You don't have to read that one to understand this one, though. It's a stand alone.

Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon or any broadcasting networks. If I did, I wouldn't be writing this.

"Hey, Sets."

"Hello, Haruka."

"What-cha doing?"

"I'm minding my own business, as I wish you would."

Haruka sat on the couch beside her housemate. It wasn't often she got to bother the other woman with no one else in the house to stop her. "Aww, Sets. You're not enjoying our alone time?"

"I was enjoying my alone time. You're ruining it. Go back to your cars."

"You don't have to be so blunt. Well, I missed you, so I'm going to stay here with you.

"What-cha watching?"

"The history channel."

Haruka grinned. "Reminiscing?"

"Hardly. This is far from accurate."

"You would know, wouldn't you."

"I would."

They sat in a silence that was only awkward for Haruka and was only disturbed by the monotone narration of the television.

"Hey, Sets."

"We went through that already."

"I was trying to get your attention."

"You have it. What do you want?"

Haruka belatedly noticed how Setsuna drolled on the same way the narrator on the tv did. "Can you turn to something more interesting?"

"Such as?"

"I don't know. Adult Swim? MTV? One of the adult channels?"

Setsuna raised an eyebrow, but made no other move, especially not toward the remote. "No, I cannot. Nor will I."

Haruka considered her options. She knew she was faster than the old fart on the other end of the couch, but she had farther to reach. She decided to go for it.

"Don't think about it, Haruka."

The younger woman froze. Setsuna was too creepy for anyone's good. "Think about what?"

"You want to try to get the remote. Don't think about it. Go watch tv in your room."

"This tv is bigger."

"I was here first."

The lady was still drolling on. Haruka wondered if it had to do with the effect of too much boring tv on the mind. "Sets I don't think all of this nonesense is good for you."

"And you think adult swim is better?"

"It's entertaining!"

"So is this."

"Come on! This is so not interesting. He talks all boring-like, and his face never changes, and... Sets..."

"What?"

"Oh my God, Sets! He's just like you."

The older woman frowned, but didn't say a word or tear her gaze from the television.

Haruka was getting upset. She just knew her last comment would get a rise out of the older woman. Her eyes fell on the remote control again.

"I already told you, don't think about it."

Haruka frowned. This woman was worse than her mom. "Sets," she whined, "this shit is boring!"

"Watch your mouth. Better yet, go watch your own television."

"This one is bigger!"

"You always accuse me of being senile, but you're the one who repeats the same things multiple times. You should get your memory checked."

Haruka crossed her arms. "My memory is fine. I want to watch this tv."

"You're behaving like a child. Your tv is big enough. Go watch that."

"You're wasting cable! Who watches the History channel 3D?"

"It's not a waste. I'm making proper use of it. It's available to be watched; I'm watching it."

Haruka growled and lunged for the remote. She just knew she should have felt it in her hands, but when she looked up, Setsuna was holding it.

"Did you have an uncontrollable urge to make out with the carpet, just now?"

Haruka got up, grumbling. She hadn't even seen the other woman move. "Why can't you turn?"

"Why would I turn when I want to watch this?"

For the first time, Haruka curse that the tv didn't have buttons on the set. No one knew what they'd do if the remote got lost.

"You're not made of glass. Get out of the way."

Haruka smirked. If she couldn't watch the tv, Setsuna couldn't either.

"You're quite childish, Haruka. Move or I will move you."

The blond didn't move a muscle.

Setsuna reached out her arm and her staff appeared in her hand. "Get out of the way, blondie."

The blond eyed the staff, unsure if the other woman was bluffing. Regardless, she didn't move.

Setsuna brought her staff down hard on Haruka's skull. "What the hell?"

The time mage's face was still expressionless. "Move."

The hit she recieved only made her more stubborn. "No."

Setsuna paused to blink, then brought her staff dond on Haruka's head a second time, and a third."

"Fuck! Ouch! Stop hitting me!"

After the fifth wack, Setsuna paused, allowing the other woman time to move. She didn't, so a sixth and seventh wack came.

"You old bat! Stop hitting me! Fuck! That hurts!"

The beating paused. "Move."

"No!"

The beating resumed. "What the fuck?! Stop hitting me! Ouch! Fuck! Stop it, bitch!"

Setsuna's staff froze mid-swing. Haruka belatedly realized her mistake. The older woman stood, transforming in the process. She held her staff toward the blond in front of her, and smiled in satisfaction when the other woman disappeared.

* * *

"Setsuna."

"Yeah?"

"Have you seen Haruka? I check the whole house and I can't find her."

Setsuna smiled. "I've seen her. I have a feeling she'll be popping up around here soon."

Michiru frowned. "Did she go somewhere?"

Setsuna simply nodded, smile never falling off of her face.

"Where did she go?"

"She went on an adventure."

Michiru raised an eyebrow. "Please tell me you didn't send her time travelling."

Setsuna's smile grew. "I can't tell you that."

The aquanette's eyes widened. "Where did she go? Is she coming back? Bring her back Sets!"

"Calm down. I can't bring her back because I have no idea where she went. She'll be back, though. I just don't know when. She'll tell you where she went, and I'll act like I knew all along."

Michiru gaped. "You don't know where she is?! What if she dies?! I'll never know!"

Setsuna let her smile fall. "She can't die in another time. She'll get kicked back here before she can make any changes to the timeline. It won't be long."

Michiru eyed the other woman wearily. "Alright, but if she's not back in a week, I'm gonna kick your ass, Sets."

The older woman felt her smile return. It wouldn't be that long. As a matter of fact, the woman should be coming back in a few hours. "Don't worry; she's fine. Just don't tell her that I had no idea where I sent her or how to get her back. It's more fun if she thinks I know what's going on."

The shorter woman shook her head. Her friend looked insane with that grin on her face. "I won't tell, but she better come back.

* * *

Flop.

"Welcome back, Haruka. Did you have fun?"

"Setsuna, I'm going to kill you! Those fucking dinosaurs are ferocious!"

Setsuna internally laughed. Dinosaurs. Perfect. "I could have let you die. Be greatful I decided to bring your annoying ass back."

Michiru smirked from the corner, well aware of the lie. So long as Haruka was alive, she didn't really care what Setsuna did to her. Her lover always deserved it.

Haruka stood up, rubbing her sore behind. "Yeah, yeah. You could have sent me somewhere less dangerous. I didn't know if I would be coming back."

Setsuna smiled. "Do not ever call me a bitch."

A/N: Love it, hate it, let me know what you think. In other words, review, please. =D


End file.
